Infidels and the cheaters who love them

Copyright 2006 X & Y Communications Have you ever happened across the Jerry Springer Show (I know this group can't actually be Tivoing it or anything…too high class a crowd) and noticed how people who are cheaters can’t seem to venture too far from home? I mean, the “other partner” always seems to be drawn from a very shallow pool of best friends, sisters, brothers, father-in-laws, etc. All the time. If you are going to cheat, at least get far enough from the nest that you at might have a fighter’s chance at not getting caught. Right? And good grief, does anyone ever think about how awkward the family time at Thanksgiving is going to be when all of the dust clears? For the record, no. Cheaters don't think about any of this stuff. There is no thought process there. Just the occasional adrenaline rush. Whatever. Practically speaking, cheaters are by definition non-thinkers. Consideration of details like process and consequences generally cannot be bothered with at all, let alone managed effectively in these situations. So then, it’s not surprising that cheaters tend to get found out…and lose. Now, don’t get me wrong. I’m not discounting the concept of someone wanting out of a dismal relationship so badly that they may actually want to get caught cheating, just so the burden of ending the relationship is on the other person. I'm sure that enters into it often, actually. Heavy stuff. Or should I say, pathetic stuff. Obviously I ruminate upon this sort of thing a good bit. I should, after all it’s my job to. But still, the concept of cheating on a partner in a committed relationship always causes me to rehearse the line, “what goes around comes around” just one more time. Why? Well, it’s simple. We as human beings have a pattern. Whether we like it or not, we tend to be painfully predictable. At the very fiber of our being, what makes up our moral core is going to dominate…every time. So it follows logically that if you choose to cheat, you are going to live the life of a cheater. Somebody reading this just said, “Duh.” I couldn’t agree more. “Duh.” So what is up with all the cheating? There are clear consequences to living that lifestyle, and they basically involve getting what you deserve…infidelity. Essentially, if you build a relationship upon the premise of cheating, how can you possibly expect anything in the future but...more cheating? It has been said that after the first time cheating happens, it is forever easier thereafter to repeat the offense. I think there is decidedly some truth to that concept. Once conscience is breached, the proverbial Pandora's Box is opened. Suppose for a brief second that you are feeling bored, sick, unattracted and/or flaky toward you committed partner. You have an affair with someone who "floats your boat" more buoyantly. Yeah, well, both you and your new, apparently exciting friend are CHEATERS. And should you choose to leave your committed partner for your new friend, you will both still be CHEATERS. The takeaway here is that both YOU and your PARTNER will have built whatever you build together upon CHEATING. Did you get that? And guess what? You’ll do it again. Like it or not, cheaters indeed keep cheating. Yours will be a relationship built upon dishonesty and lack of integrity. How do you expect such a union to last? Rest assured it will not. Meanwhile, your spurned ex will be out deserving what he or she wants. A faithful partner is a good catch. Will you be left wallowing in the error of your ways? Not if you deserve what you want today…and stay true to the partner you say you love. If there are issues, work them out. If you need to get out more together, make it happen. And if you need to break up an exclusive relationship, do so before heading on to "greener pastures". The proper thing to do is break off one committed relationship before starting another. This is the only way around the cheating issue. And yes...if you are "separated"...consider thoroughly the importance of waiting until the divorce is final before dating other people. You are still married until that happens, and dating under these circumstances generally raises subtle doubts in the mind of those you go out with. But for Heaven’s sake…whatever you do, don’t sleep with your brother-in-law just to make a point, okay? It’s not going to lead to happiness.

10 Relocation tips to keep yourself centered when your world is spinning

Ten tips for happy relocation (across town and around the world) Relocation is stressful because you change more than your address. You'll begin to navigate a new way to be a spouse, parent, friend, lover, choir member, PTA officer, and more. Here are ten tips to a help you tune in to your inner compass when your world is spinning. 1. Ask, "Who am I? What do I need to be happy?" The secret to a successful move depends on how you answer the question, "Can I still be me?” To answer this question, write ten “I am” statements about yourself -- anything from “I am a mother” to “I am a dog-owner” to “I am friendly and outgoing.” Before you move, ask yourself, “How will this list change after I move?” You may still be a dog-owner and a dad...but will you create these roles the same way? 2. Take a test drive. When you buy a car, you don't just go around the block. You try the freeways and the rough roads. Considering a move to Seattle or Syracuse? Study the culture as if you were an anthropologist. What do people do? How do they dress? How do they talk to each other? Most important, how do you feel? Did you develop new allergies, headaches or back pain during your visit? Or did you find yourself wishing you cold stay forever? 3. Pack an emotional first aid kit. Most hikers pack a first aid kit with sunblock, band-aids, and insect repellent. For relocation you can pack Coping phrases to repeat when you feel frazzled: "Let go and relax." "I can deal with this." "I face the future with confidence." Tapes of meditation and visualization (for unexpected bouts of anxiety) Favorite photos of friends, family, places and pets (so you remember who you are) Phone numbers of trusted confidantes (for moments when you really need to hear a familiar voice) 4. Develop ceremonies to honor your new life. As you unpack boxes or begin a new assignment, play your favorite music and enjoy your favorite foods. Arrange one room - or one corner of the room-to look familiar. Some people create a special ritual of settling in to make the new life their own. 5. Plan for downtime. For the first few months you'll probably have gaps in your calendar. Maybe you had a standing dinner date with the neighbors on Wednesdays. You held office in civic organizations and you took classes. Plan to fill downtime with meaningful projects. I recommend taking on a challenging creativity project. Write a novelplete a painting. Join a dance group. And I would add a physical activity, anything from weight-lifting at the gym to running marathons to walking the dog extra times. When you nurture yourself, you communicate strength and confidence to others. If you are seen as vulnerable and needy, you will attract negative people and negative experiences. 6. Take your time as you make new commitments. Most newcomers need two to five years to make lasting friends. During your first six months, avoid joining organizations (let alone running for office). Sign up for short-term options so you can test the waters. You won't know the hidden dimensions of joining. Once I eagerly joined a group, only to learn that their meetings were held in out-of-the-way places - and that's where most members lived! A huge waste of time and dues. 7. Celebrate everyday life. Think small. A walk around the lake. A perfect cup of coffee in a nearby coffee shop. A friendly face at the trade show. Listen for the moments when you say, “I could get used to this...” No matter what happens, you will find at least one pocket of joy in your new life...usually something wonderful you never anticipated.

The perfect gift basket

When a holiday is fast approaching and there is no room at a mall or store to shop around to look for a perfect gift because of all the people doing their shopping. A gift basket is the perfect thing to give for any holiday to anyone on your shopping list, be it your loved one, boss or an in-laws, the perfect gift is a gift basket full of surprises. Finding a gift can be hard and even a chore when you do not know which way to go about it is the best way for the person you need a gift to give too. Giving the same gift every year can get a bit boring and sometimes stressful with the thoughts of wondering if the other person will be happy with their old, but new gift is running through your head. Well next time a special occasion happens to come up try a gift basket, it says fun and happiness all wrapped up in a cute little package, or even a big package! Gift baskets are a great way to show creativity and almost any gift can be placed in a basket. With all the frills and bows on top makes it for an exciting gift and a nice surprise. Gift baskets can be made up to suit anyone needs and styles. To put a spin on gift certifies add some tissue paper and a teddy bear holding them. Jams and jellies are also a great way to say you are sweet to someone in a gift basket. The greatest thing for a boss to complement him with a basket and inside having two tickets to a sporting event in or around the area, try adding concession coupons for him or her to have a snack while he is at the game. Tickets to a local musical can also be done this way and is a vgreat way to show the boss that you have style and class when it comes to the outside world.

How to play animals

: While sitting around with friends this weekend I discovered the greatest card game ever. The name of the game is Animals, and the game is very easy to learn, easy to play and a great source of entertainment. The game is not a gambling game but gambling can be done easily enough, but I would not expect to see this game in your local casino anytime soon. I suspect the game started out as a memory game for children, then was taken you young adults and turned into a drinking game, but it does not matter if you are gambling with this game, drinking with this game or just trying to have a fun evening with friends, because it is fun whatever you are playing for. The best way to play the game is with at least 4 people but no more then 8. You will also need 2 or 3 decks of cards to play Animals and a table for everyone to sit around. Before the game starts each player must choose an animal noise and a hand gesture to represent them in the game and going around the table each player must announce the name of their animal, the sound the animal makes and its hand gesture. An example of this would be to say I am a cat, meow and the hand gesture may be wiping your face with the back of your hand. In this game the dealer remains standing the entire round. The dealer will go around the table continuously dealing 1 card to each player until all the cards have been dealt. The dealer must stay at a steady pace and go not too fast and not too slow. the players must continuously scan the other players top cards and when someone has the same number card on top of their pile as you, you have to make that persons sound and hand gesture. If you do it before they do you get all their cards. That person is not out of the game the next time the dealer goes around they still get another card. The person with the most cards at the end of the game winds, and is the dealer for the next round. For kids this is a great game because they have to remember everyone's noise and gesture, this is a fun way for them to help develop their memories, and a great way to get them away from the television for a little while. For those looking to gamble this game may not earn you as much as playing Blackjack but it is a lot if fun to sit around and make fools of yourselves and make a few bucks. All you have to do is set an amount and everyone puts their money into a pot and the winner gets the pot. It does not get any easier then that. The drinking game has an extra rule or two. If you make someone's noise and gesture before they do yours, besides getting their cards they need to drink and at the end of each round all the losers need to drink.

Personalize any occasion with unusual custom cameras

Whether it's a wedding reception, a sports gathering, an anniversary party, or even a baby shower, these special occasions and others can be even more meaningful with custom cameras. Photos are necessary to capture these once-in-a-lifetime moments. Why not let your guests capture them for you with unique custom cameras? These types of cameras are both decorative and useful. Here are some ways to make the most of every event with custom cameras. Wedding Day Moments There can be many meaningful, sad, happy, and even funny moments during a wedding reception. One wedding photographer can't possibly capture all of them. But with disposable wedding cameras, many of these moments can be captured on film by your guests. Here's how. Order customized wedding cameras in advance and place one or two cameras on each guest table. Invite your guests to take the photos as they fellowship. Be sure they get photos of all the children and grown-ups at the wedding. Ask them to capture special moments for you! They'll be glad to do it - and it's something fun for everyone. You can even order special wedding cameras with your names and wedding date printed on the cameras to add that personal touch. Disposable wedding cameras are decorative, and there are many styles to choose from, so you can easily find custom cameras to match your wedding decor. Don't Miss the Action at Parties If you're busy serving food and drinks, cleaning, answering questions, etc. - all while trying to enjoy talking with your party guests - you probably won't have time to snap pictures! This is when custom cameras really come in handy. Order several custom cameras to spread among guests and have your party guests take pictures for you. Each guest will capture unique moments that you probably would have missed. Custom cameras come in many themes so you can include them at almost any type of party. There are disposable sports-themed cameras as well as custom disposable cameras for birthdays, holidays, baby showers, proms, graduations, Bar Mitzvahs, and many other events. They are great for almost any special occasion where pictures are a must! At a sports party, for instance, you might order custom disposable cameras with the team's logo to show team spirit and to match your sports decor. There are licensed custom cameras with NFL, NBA and MLB team logos for the choosing. Where to Buy Custom Cameras You can find a variety of custom camera choices by shopping online or perhaps at a local specialty printing company. Buying online is easy because you can order any time of the day, search through many custom camera themes, and have them delivered to your doorstep. If you feel that you can use a little help getting photos of your next big event or party, choose custom cameras and let your guests do all the work. It's the easiest way to capture those special moments!